Author: Elizabeth Joy

You probably wouldn’t be surprised to know that people are longing to feel more joy in life. The last few years have taken a toll on most of us as we navigated the realities and fallout of a worldwide pandemic.

Many of us experienced loss, division, grief, loneliness and isolation, hopelessness, trauma, anger, and intense sadness. And those emotions that may just have begun in 2020 are still hanging on in ways we do and don’t recognize.

Even without a pandemic to consider, though, joy often seems elusive to people. It is easy for negative emotions to overtake us, and for us to struggle to enjoy the lives we live.

And for those of us who are Christians, this can be confusing. We see in scripture that it’s the joy of the Lord that strengthens us, so why does it sometimes seem so difficult to feel more joy?

5 Ways to Release Negative Emotions so you can Feel More Joy

I pray these practical steps can be an encouragement to you so you can feel more joy.

1. Practice Gratitude

I first read Ann Voskamp’s book One Thousand Gifts when it came out in 2011. And even though the simple concept of gratitude wasn’t new to me, this book revolutionized my life.

Voskamp demonstrated beautifully how Jesus’ miracles always followed His thanksgiving. When I began to look again at these stories and saw that pattern, it shifted my whole idea of gratitude. Instead of waiting for the Lord to answer my prayers, I could be grateful and expectant even before He did.

So I began to practice gratitude. Daily, moment-by-moment gratitude. The kind that notices things. Stops and breathes in for a minute. Pauses to be still and know that God is God.

And I discovered a direct correlation between gratitude, emotions, and being able to feel more joy.

Maybe you want to start a gratitude journal, like Voskamp suggests. Or maybe you want to develop the habit of voicing your thankfulness out loud. Perhaps your thanks will come out in handwritten letters and notes to people, or in blog and social media posts. Whichever way you choose to develop your habit of thanksgiving, I fully expect you to release negative emotions so you can feel more joy too.

2. Clarify your Purpose

One of the chief things I’ve discovered that steals joy from many women is that they aren’t clear about their purpose. They don’t have a good understanding of what God made them to do and be here on earth. And so they struggle to feel more joy because they are either aimless or over-committed. Either way, they are living without joy because they are living without purpose.

As Christ followers, we have a clear twofold purpose given in scripture: Love God and Love Others.

And the amazing thing is that God designed each and every one of us to be able to live out that purpose in very unique-to-us ways. When He created us, He wove desires, skills, abilities, and inclinations into us that would perfectly suit us living out His purposes for us. And the beautiful, generous thing about that is that, when we live into our purpose according to our unique design, we are most fulfilled and we feel more joy. God loves it when we are fulfilled in our calling!

Purpose lights us up!

For instance, I could help people know God’s love by sewing clothes for them. I know the basics of sewing. BUT it isn’t a unique passion or gift that I have. It doesn’t light me up. So, I know it’s not one of the skills and gifts God wove into me to help me feel more joy as I live out my purpose.

However, I am skilled at teaching and coaching women. It lights me up when I can help other women to do self-assessment and uncover their unique gifts. I get very animated and excited when women I’m helping have lightbulb moments and learn to say their best “yes.”

I know God designed me to teach and coach women and to help them redesign their lives. It gives me life and fulfillment while helping others. I get to use this unique skill and gift to love God and love others.

When we do the work of self-discovery to uncover our unique purpose, we begin to feel more joy. Rather than giving ourselves away day after day to things that do not light us up, we can begin to redesign our lives to love God and love others by leaning into our own strengths and passions.

3. Build Community

We weren’t made to do life alone. We know this because we were made in the image of God, and He is a triune being, in perfect communion. He invited us into relationship with Himself, and with the family of God. And I guarantee that we will feel more joy as we lean into the beauty and complexity of biblical community.

Not only does our biblical community give us the opportunity to be supported in all the different seasons of life, but it also becomes the place where we can be challenged, held accountable, and where we can grow.

As we lean into relationships, we begin to feel more joy because we discover more about who God is and how He is working in people’s lives. We don’t see God in a vacuum anymore, but we recognize Him in our brothers and sisters.

We also have the opportunity to learn more about ourselves as we lean into our community, finding ways to live into the purpose we are discovering, and noticing how our gifts and skills play out practically and tangibly in other people’s lives.

Listen, after such a long season of isolation, you may have found yourself stuck in the habit of aloneness. But I want to invite you to pursue relationships with other followers of Jesus. I want to challenge you to lean in to Biblical community, for the sake of your own discipleship, and theirs. For the opportunity to be practical hands and feet of Christ. And in order for you to begin to be less isolated and to feel more joy.

4. Incorporate Aromatherapy

It’s been a few years since I started incorporating essential oils into my wellness journey. I started that for a number of reasons, but I continue it for so many more.

I didn’t know that I would begin to feel more joy simply by developing a new wellness habit and starting to use plants that impact my body, my emotions, and my mental health.

But the thousands of testimonials I’ve encountered over the last few years became bolstered by my own experience, where I’ve discovered that aromatherapy actually does support me in times of anxiousness and sadness. They actually do help me think more clearly, and regulate frustration and even anger. Specific essential oils made the world of difference in my emotional regulation through a season of grief from the loss of my sweet mother to cancer.

I will not be without plant oils again because they have been game changers for me. And if you are on a search to feel more joy, I invite you to consider adding those into your wellness routine. I can help!

5. Choose Intentional Thoughts

Paul encouraged the Philippians to be very intentional about their thoughts. He contrasted anxiousness against peace, and challenged them to choose their thoughts in order to move from one to the other.

His benchmarks for the thought life were things that were true, noble, right pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy.

When we streamline our thought life with rejoicing and the discipline to keep those things Paul encouraged at the forefront, we shift our whole way of perceiving and interacting with the world. We will feel more joy when we choose to keep Philippians 4:8 thoughts front-of-mind.

If you are on a journey to release negative emotions so you can feel more joy, your thoughts will be pivotal.

• You will choose to lay down anxiousness and pick up peace.
• You’ll opt to rejoice more than complain
• Gratitude will become more natural
• You’ll experience more light-hearted moments and have a more optimistic perspective

Paul knew what he was talking about. And he encouraged the Philippians that the strength to live this way, and to be content in all things, was possible with the help of the Lord.

So you want to release negative emotions and feel more joy

I’m here for it! As your Joy Let Loose encourager and coach, I’m called to this very thing! And I LOVE to celebrate when people choose to become more intentional with their lives so that they begin to radiate with purpose and joy.

Because whatever we are living spills out on others. And I much prefer to spill out joy than anything else. Do you want to let JOY loose too?

Tell me in the comments: Which of these 5 things will you try first so you can begin to feel more joy in your life? And how can I come alongside you in your next steps?

Here for your joy and wellness!

Elizabeth Joy